I have to tell you, Brits sure are easy to make fun of. The folks in the UK just seem to regularly pop up in the news with fun and interesting fetish issues. Maybe it’s all that proper upbringing but they sure seem to manage to goof in grand and very public style. First there was the mayor who posted a fetish porn picture on a counsel member’s Facebook webpage. Now we have Ronnie Campbell, a Member of Parliament who “accidentally” gave his support to National Fetish Day. He apparently didn’t score very high on the vocabulary part of whatever the British equivalent of the S.A.T. is because he said he thought “fetish” was just another word for “worry”.

So when asked to participate in the national day for fetishes, he said he’d be happy to show his support.

National Fetish Day organizers have an official color - purple. And their tagline is “Perverts Wear Purple” because of it’s use in bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism. Those who want to aid the cause of National Fetish Day are encouraged to wear something with that color, like a shirt, tie, hair band, or something else that signifies support.

Read the rest of this entry »

(4 votes, average: 3.75 out of 5)

 Loading ...

Just to bring the story in the previous post about the UK Labour Party MP who agreed to support National Fetish Day full circle, he has responded to the Sun’s report with the following letter:

AFTER reading Ian Robson’s article in the Sunday Sun it appears that I have once again made news in the Press thanks to you stating that I have a fetish for horses.

It would seem that you have a knack of twisting and turning things, hence making me look stupid.

As stated in your article the word fetish (noun) means sexual interest. This is true, however, it can also be used in another context as it also implies having an obsession or fixation with something i.e. in my case, betting on horses.

I would never have agreed to support anything that had the title “Perverts wear Purple” and I do not imagine any other Member of Parliament would either.

Read the rest of this entry »

(2 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5)

 Loading ...

Reflexology is the technique of squeezing and massaging the feet to improve health or have an effect on other parts of the body. And by golly you can get a degree in it. You can actually get a certificate then charge money for something most men would do for free. In the fantasy, of course, all of the customers are beautiful women. I guess the downside to hanging out your shingle as a reflexologist is that people show up with feet you really wouldn’t even want to look at, much less massage.

A Canadian dude is finding out the hard way that impersonating a reflexologist just to get his hands on a woman’s feet is a mistake.

To try and keep all this straight, you need to know this true news report out of Canada has three women as main characters - an aunt, her niece, and a grandmother. They were all moving the niece into her new apartment when up walked a stranger who called himself “Tyrone”.

Read the rest of this entry »

(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5)

 Loading ...

The Consumer Electronic Show (CES) has closed in Las Vegas. This annual orgy of electronic gizmos is surely a testament to imagination and sometimes weirdness. Pictured at the left is the Shoe Pure. This thing resembles a kitchen device I owned one time for steaming broccoli. However this machine kills bacteria and deodorizes your shoes by pumping in ozone. And in what must cause interior designers everywhere to roll their eyes in disbelief, it’s also promoted as a tabletop decorator item.

Kind of makes you want to draw a smiley face on the thing, doesn’t it?

The company says it “looks stunning with illuminated light”. I wasn’t positive what this meant until I found their website (a chore in itself), and they had another picture of it - glowing in the dark. (Ohhhh…kiddies, look at the new night light I bought you for nearly $70).

So here I sit scratching my head and wondering, are my shoes so disgusting that I need a special machine to clean the inside of them? Maybe mine are, but those of you who know a bit more about well worn auctions on eBay also know that disinfecting a pair of well worn shoes you bought on eBay has as much appeal as say, boiling ice cream before eating it.

Read the rest of this entry »

(1 votes, average: 4 out of 5)

 Loading ...

Hot dog! I’ve got a new favorite sport. Well, not quite yet, but I’m sure it’s going to be after I start following World Wrestling Entertainment more closely. Up to this point I’ve not been much of a wrestling fan. I’ve always like the women’s costumes, of course, but truthfully I never paid much attention. But I just found out that the hot wrestling diva who does the GoDaddy Superbowl commercials also did bondage and foot fetish photos. Candice Michelle is her name, Tie Me Up is her game.

Let me tell you this girl has a long resume for someone who hasn’t yet reached age thirty. In addition to GoDaddy, she was a Playboy cover girl, appeared on television and in movies, and was in an HBO softcore series called Hotel Erotica, which sadly, I missed.

And why didn’t somebody tell me they had Lingerie Pillow Fights and Bra and Panty Matches on these shows? Damn, I thought they just, well - wrestled.
Read the rest of this entry »

(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5)

 Loading ...

I gotta tell you, Ashley Madison is about to smother me. I know that name sounds like it should belong to a porn star, but it’s actually the website that hooks you up so you can get freaky with people who are already married or in an existing relationship. If you are one of these folks then you’ve got an itch and need somebody other than your partner to scratch it.

When you are setting up your profile the website has some way cool fetish type preferences from which you can choose. So whether you are in to feather tickling, latex, bondage, or just plain ol’ regular whips and chains, seems like they have the bases covered. But I never suspected there were this many attached women in my area who were looking to cheat. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised but truly, I am.

I signed up for the Ashley Madison website awhile back as an experiment so I could review it and report on what I found. And it wasn’t long before the email introductions start rolling in.

Read the rest of this entry »

(2 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5)

 Loading ...

I don’t usually start a post by making a disclaimer, but I need to warn you I don’t know jack about what I’m getting ready to describe. You know how you go looking for one thing, and before you know it you gasping in amazement at something totally unexpected? That happened last night. I stumbled on robot fetishism.

As someone who generally prefers flesh and blood women, I’d not even thought about the erotic possibilities of cuddling with a computerized hunk of metal, rubber and fiberglass. But when you think about it I guess a vibrator is just the phallic equivalent of a penis without the guidance of a brain. Most men qualify on that count at one time or another in their life, so maybe it’s not that big a deal. And after all, those Stepford Wives were pretty sexy.

What got me going down this trail was accidentally running across a book on eBay called Love & Sex With Robots by David Levy. Ol’ Doc Levy is an expert on artificial intelligence and has written a book on - ahem - intimate relationships with robotic partners. I have not read the book yet, although I intend to, as I’m now very curious about where the technology stands and how long it will be before they’re stocking them at Walmart.

Seems like a sexy robot lover would solve a lot of problems for many men with partners who have “headaches”, menstrual cycles, get pregnant, or who prefer to shop rather than have sex. Wonder if you handcuff a robot to the bedposts if they are strong enough to break them?

I’m working from other reviews here, but apparently Levy describes all kinds of interesting devices that we can look forward to in the future. Sounds like thing are going to be pretty damn good when it comes to robot lovin’. Because they can be programmed, robots will always be the perfect companion, doing whatever you want, whenever you want, always making you the center of their existence. They will have no conservative upbringing so that little freaky action you’ve always wanted to try won’t be a problem. Sexually transmitted diseases certainly won’t be an issue and if your wallet is big enough you could have a killer orgy, too. The downside has to be that they are always faking their orgasm.

Which comes back to where I started, with a robot fetish. That’s a whole other topic, and I’m researching it now. I’ll share what I find in awhile. In the meantime I’ve placed a huge order from Adam & Eve, and will be tinkering in the garage to see what contribution I can make to science.

This video is really funny. Called “Is Paris Hilton An Android?”, it shows some Japanese made robots cut in with shots of Paris. Frankly, they make a pretty convincing case. Follow the link below to see who is smarter. And if you don’t like the video, the sound track is worth a listen.

Read the rest of this entry »

(1 votes, average: 4 out of 5)

 Loading ...

I keep hoping I will stop running across ways to waste time on the Internet, but just when I think I can’t possibly spend another minute at this and still keep my job, along comes something else irresistible.

Awhile back I wrote about a website for people in committed relationships who are still looking for action on the side. In one of those “things you stumble upon while looking for other stuff” moments I just found another dating website with a twist. Since I’m in a relationship with a wonderful woman who thinks I’m a god, I’m not cruising the online dating sites looking for action - this was 100% legitimate research.

Okcupid is a free online dating service and their gimmick is user and staff written “tests”. The site is created in an irreverent, entertaining style, with lots of humor and they have a couple of tests to check your level of kink. If you’re game and want to have a bit of fun to start out the new year, you can give one or both of these a whirl.

The Unconventional Sex Test is a series of 52 questions on bondage, fetish and S&M. Answer the questions and get back an evaluation of how conventional you’d like your sex life to be.

The Kinkyness Test has 28 questions and does about the same thing. A little shorter but it also won’t give you as many new ideas and send you running to eBay to look up the cost of a spreader bar.

This site was a lot of fun, with articles like “Proven Ways To Prevent Sex”, and “The Fat Project”, which is a carefully documented study of 2 people trying to gain 30 pounds in 30 days. They have hundreds of other entertaining tests as well on just about any subject you can name.

So, all things considered, I’ve wasted more time on less entertaining websites. The tests are fun and you can even benchmark your ratings with other people your age. I’d share my kinkiness rating with you but frankly, I’m ashamed.

It looks like the folks at the 11 year anniversary celebration of the fetish fashion show had a grand time this year, and they have most of the fetish bases covered. Bet they would pass both tests with top scores. For a quick and sexy overview of fetish fashions and such, check out this 4 minute clip showcasing what the fashionable well dressed fetishist is wearing.

Read the rest of this entry »

(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5)

 Loading ...

Every year The Literary Review of London gives it’s award for Bad Sex in Fiction. Now these are not erotic airport novels to be flipped through and then forgotten, these are serious novelists who are trying to write good fiction. And it’s The Literary Review, for heaven’s sake. Well, I don’t know who they are, but they sound impressive, don’t they? And they had Courtney Love giving out the awards. No only does she have the right last name, there’s something that makes me think that woman can easily identify bad sex because to look at her you just know she’s had plenty of it.

At any rate they give out annual awards in the hope of discouraging authors and publishers from including unconvincing, embarrassing, or redundant passages about the sex act in what would otherwise be a sound literary novel. Does it work? Well, apparently not since The Literary Review has been giving out the award for fourteen years and authors keep writing stuff like this:

Slither slither slither slither went the tongue, but the hand that was what she tried to concentrate on, the hand, since it has the entire terrain of her torso to explore and not just the otorhinolaryngological caverns - oh God, it was not just at the border where the flesh of the breast joins the pectoral sheath of the chest - no, the hand was cupping her entire right - Now! She must say ‘No, Hoyt’ and talk to him like a dog…

Oh baby baby I am so turned on. Doesn’t that get you hot and make you want to jump into bed? Not doing it for you? Try this then:

She is so small and so compact, and yet she has all the necessary features… Shall I compare thee to a Sony Walkman, thou are more compact and more. She is his own Toshiba, his dinky little JVC, his sweet Aiwa. Aiwa - She says, as he enters her slimy red-peppers-in-olive-oil cunt - Aiwa, aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwa aiwaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh.

These are from serious novels folks. The kind that have rich and famous authors and who get invited to speak in front of lots of people and meet the Queen. But if they are writing about sex is based on their experience, I think we’d all be best advised to stay out of their classroom.

I you’re interested in more you can read the winning passages from this year’s nominations, or the writing that created the first place winners from previous years.

OR….for something really funny, check out this video with two girls singing about really bad orgasm sex with a boyfriend. Bet one of them slept with the guy who won this year’s Bad Sex in Fiction Award…

Read the rest of this entry »

(2 votes, average: 5 out of 5)

 Loading ...

Someone who knows I write this blog asked me if I was going to publish something on Christmas Day, kinda implying by their tone that maybe this should be the one day of the year it was my duty to skip.

Newspaper editorials, preachers from their pulpits, and water cooler office jockeys all lament every year how we’ve lost the original meaning of Christmas. Our annual ritual seems to consist of running to Walmart and Target to buy things for family and friends. Then there is a high likelihood that what we buy is not what they want, and they’ll just end up re-gifting to someone to fulfill a birthday obligation.

So in the spirit of buying stuff, I started thinking about it and it seems like this is a perfect day to celebrate a fetish or two. After all, I’m betting that lots of you put some fetish items under your tree for your wife, girlfriend, partner or sex worker. And many of you that didn’t deep down inside probably wanted to. I know that I’ve had my eye on a new toy for awhile, but haven’t yet worked up the nerve to have “the conversation” about this particular thing to see if there is openness on the part of my girlfriend. I need to put that talk on my list of New Year resolutions. If I get a “yes” (and I’m actually hoping for a “YES!”) then I’ll be buying that fetish item as quickly as possible and I won’t need a holiday excuse.

Here’s a funny little sexy Christmas fetish short to get you through the day. Follow the link below to see how some of us, at least, would like to celebrate.

Read the rest of this entry »

(3 votes, average: 4.67 out of 5)

 Loading ...